Adegan Cikgu Bahasa 'Malaysia'

Murid : Selamat pagi, cikgu.
Cikgu : (Menengking) Mengapa selamat pagi sahaja? Petang dan malam awak doakan saya tak selamat?

Murid : Selamat pagi, petang dan malam cikgu!
Cikgu : Panjang sangat! Tak pernah dibuat oleh orang! Kata selamat sejahtera! Senang dan penuh bermakna. Lagipun ucapan ini meliputi semua masa dan keadaan.

Murid : Selamat sejahtera cikgu!
Cikgu : Sama-sama, duduk! Dengar sini baik-baik. Hari ini cikgu nak uji kamu semua tentang perkataan berlawan. Bila cikgu sebutkan perkataannya, kamu semua mesti menjawab dengan cepat, lawan bagi perkataan-perkataan itu, faham?
Murid : Faham, cikgu!


Cikgu : Saya tak mahu ada apa-apa gangguan.
Murid : (senyap)

Cikgu : Pandai!
Murid : Bodoh!

Cikgu : Tinggi!
Murid : Rendah!

Cikgu : Jauh!
Murid : Dekat!

Cikgu : Keadilan!
Murid : UMNO!

Cikgu : Salah!
Murid : Betul!

Cikgu : Bodoh!
Murid : Pandai!

Cikgu : Bukan!
Murid : Ya!

Cikgu : Oh Tuhan!
Murid : Oh Hamba!

Cikgu : Dengar ini!
Murid : Dengar itu!

Cikgu : Diam!
Murid : Bising!

Cikgu : Itu bukan pertanyaan, bodoh!
Murid : Ini ialah jawapan, pandai!

Cikgu : Mati aku!
Murid : Hidup kami!

Cikgu : Rotan baru tau!
Murid : Akar lama tak tau!

Cikgu : Malas aku ajar kamu!
Murid : Rajin kami belajar cikgu!

Cikgu : Kamu gila!
Murid : Kami siuman!

Cikgu : Cukup! Cukup!
Murid : Kurang! Kurang!

Cikgu : Sudah! Sudah!
Murid : Belum! Belum!

Cikgu : Mengapa kamu semua bodoh sangat?
Murid : Sebab saya seorang pandai!

Cikgu : Oh! Melawan!
Murid : Oh! Mengalah!

Cikgu : Kurang ajar!
Murid : Cukup ajar!

Cikgu : Habis aku!
Murid : Kekal kami!

Cikgu : Mati aku!
Murid : Hidup kami!

Cikgu : O.K. Pelajaran sudah habis!
Murid : K.O. Pelajaran belum bermula!

Cikgu : Sudah, bodoh!
Murid : Belum, pandai!

Cikgu : Berdiri!
Murid : Duduk!

Cikgu : Saya kata UMNO salah!
Murid : Kami dengar KeADILan betul!

Cikgu : Bangang kamu ni!
Murid : Cerdik kami tu!

Cikgu : Rosak!
Murid : Baiki!

Cikgu : Kamu semua ditahan tengah hari ini!
Murid : Kami semua dilepaskan tengah malam itu!

Cikgu : (Senyap dan mengambil buku-bukunya keluar)
Murid : (Bising dan menyumbat buku-buku mereka ke dalam beg)





p/s : Terbahak-bahak aku baca. Very Nice. Mungkin budak2 sekarang dah tahap gini ler gamaknya!!!! Penin la kepala cikgu diorang

What are Women waiting FOR!!!

U can Help Save PALASTINE from ISREAL ATTACKS!!

For all who love eating Maggi

DO NOT IGNORE THIS ....... Especially those fond of Maggi......

'CORRECT WAY OF COOKING NOODLES'
The correct way to cook instant noodles without harming our bodies and health. `Normally, how we cook the instant noodles is to put the noodles into a pot with water, throw in the powder and let it cook for around 3 minutes and then it's ready to eat.

This is the WRONG method of cooking the instant noodles.

By doing this, when we actually boil the ingredients in the powder, normally with MSG, it will change the molecular structures of the MSG causing it to be toxic.

The other thing that you may or may not realize is that, the noodles are coated with wax and it will take around 4 to 5 days for the body to excrete the wax after you have taken the noodles.

CORRECT METHOD :

1. boil the noodles in a pot with water.
2. once the noodles is cooked, take out the noodles, and throw away the water which contains wax.
3. boil another pot of water till boiling and put the noodles into the hot boiling water and then shut the fire.
4. only at this stage when the fire is off, and while the water is very hot, put the ingredient with the powder into the water, to make noodle soup.
5. however, if you need dry noodles, take out the noodles and add the ingredient with the powder and toss it to get dry noodles.

Dietician's Note: If you buy plain hakka noodles which you make initially need to boil in water and discard the water. This will soften
the noodles but to prevent it from sticking we need to add a tbsp of oil and also the noodles are deep fried p art ially to make it crunchy and then dusted with flour to prevent it from sticking while boiling. Hence when you buy the noodles they are already made unhealthy and this is the type we use to make stir fry noodles and the regular maggi too is made the same way plus they add MSG/ ajinomoto and other chemical preservatives.

A large number of patient with the ages ranging from 18-24 years are ending up with pancreatitis either as a swelling or infection of the pancreas due to regular consumption of instant noodles.... If the frequency is more than 3 times a week, then it is very hazardous...

Please share this info and help save a life.